sometimes i just want to put a bullet through my head.

Bitch. Fuck you. I don't need you anyways.

But really I do this to myself.

because honestly sometimes i do want to kill myself.

goddamn. fuck colleges man. rejection feels like shit. and it feels even shittier that you have to pay to be rejected and that they pretend like they care, "we regret to inform you" my ass. they all get a kick out of crushing people's dreams based on an arbitrary score that doesn't actually tell them how intelligent or talented a person is. whatever. i guess that's how this shitty world works.

i'm so tired. so tired of these people. god i just can't....do it anymore. in the day time i can stand them but at night i just realize how much i hate what they stand for. i keep on reminding myself that they have problems of their own and maybe i don't know them well enough. maybe. or maybe i'm just being optimistic and they really are just as shallow as they appear to be. i hope it's the former.

Man, fuck you NYU.

sometimes i just realize how much i don't like people
even the people i like i can't stand for very long, there's just so much ego
these people are good people but i really just need a change of scenery, i need to meet other people and know that this isn't what its going to be like for the rest of my life. i need something to work towards, this standstill is so...tiring. all i do is consume, i never produce.